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"Every moment when the ultra-buff turtles are on screen, busting each other’s chops, doing human beat-box routines and ineptly pitching woo at Megan Fox (because they’re, you know, teenagers) was so acutely painful that I had to draw on my own ninja training and reflect intensively on the transitory nature of all phenomena, just to fend off the profound yearning for death."

Source: salon
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cacklefrendly:

feelinranty:

meeplol:

Have you ever played a video game where you have to sleep to recover? They only let you do it if everything is safe. Otherwise they won’t let you sleep. You’ll get a message, saying “You cannot sleep now, there are monsters nearby.”

Now, remember the last time you just couldn’t get to sleep?

I do.

Don’t you fuckin do this to me

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(via awkwardandoptimistic)

Source: meeplol
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tastefullyoffensive:

[mrlovenstein]

Now, I’m not saying she’s Satan, but she could easily be cast in the role of Satan.

Source: tastefullyoffensive
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tastefullyoffensive:

Resume Gap [amazingsuperpowers]
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fowllanguagecomics:

Otherwise known as Me vs. Ice Cream

(via tastefullyoffensive)

Source: fowllanguagecomics